for even a year yet...BUT in 12 days I will have been WITH my husband for 6 years...and we lived together for 5 & 1/2 of those years. To get off on that point really quick. It was QUICK, and my now Mother-In-Law WASN'T a fan of it, but says today she's glad it worked out. We had actually decided to be roommates before we started dating. We were good friends and BOTH needed a roommate. Ok BACK onto the topic at hand. It's not lost on me this is a dramatization. It's unlikely that she'll be THIS crazy when finally the day has come he has his OWN family...the UNFORTUNATE part is that the daughter-in-law scenario COULD potentially happen. So I guess this is me taking the Dramatic contract, and tweaking
it to what it SHOULD look like, because SOME of the requests WEREN'T completely unrealistic. Take notes Mom's and future Daughter-In-laws! I dedicate this to MY Mother-In-Law, who I feel has gotten me to the point where I am educated enough to do this blog.
- I will compliment my mother-in-law's (MIL's) cooking, her decorating, and, most importantly, the incredible way she raised her son, my husband.-Ok so this shouldn't NEED to be in the contract AT ALL. If she cooks you a great meal, yeah totally compliment her, and if not AT LEAST thank her...that's manners....same with the decorating, and yeah you love your husband? His mom played a MAJOR role in who he is. Thanking her from time to time on that? Not out of the question!
- I will marvel at my MIL's beauty and miraculously never-aging skin every time I see her.- Again should be automatic. My Mother-In-Law ALWAYS looks put together and lovely...to be honest, I think I'm guilty of not doing this enough...though I will say I usually notice her new hair-do before my husband does.
- I will acknowledge that my MIL's son is on loan to me so that we can make grandbabies, which will probably look like her and have her wonderful traits, which I will mention in conversation frequently and with great fervor.- K Sorry, no, he's not on loan. The Vows are there, and it's til death do us part. THAT being said, while forsaking all others IS a vow, a
- GOOD wife wouldn't let his mom fall into this category...unless she's a TOTAL nightmare...and I mean TOTAL
- I will remind my husband to call my MIL daily, saying, "Have you told your mother you love her today? You should, she rocks." Plus, I will throw in phrases like this:
- "That amazing woman raised you! You should call and thank her... again."
- "You can truly never thank her enough."
- "Let's go over and thank her in person."
- "We should bring her a gift when we go."
- "She's so deserving of gifts."
- "Let's take her on vacation with us."
- "And get her another gift."
- "Maybe a beautiful locket with picture
- s of you and our children."
- "No, I don't need to be in the pictures; she didn't raise me... unfortunately."- WE got a little carried away on THAT one didn't we? Ok calling her DAILY? Little much, but I DON'T think Weekly is TOO much to ask...she DID give you life (sorry honey I know you HATE the phone but you SHOULD call your mom more) Again some of them get carried away, but y'know what throwing kindness in her direction, yeah, you should!
- I will tell other women that their mothers-in-law are not as fabulous as mine, and I shall be willing to throw down in the event that said women disagree.- YUP...unless again she's a Nightmare...on any degree really.
- I will take my MIL to her weekly hair salon appointment and shopping at Loehmann's, when it is deemed necessary by age.-Yeah case to case basis... If I lived closer, I see NO problem with that
- I will spend all holidays with my husband's family, because they are so awesome and gracious, and I realize how much mine sucks by comparison. -Again, case to case basis. If you're ABLE to spend holidays with family (I'm not always) it should be SHARED FAIRLY between the TWO families, because yes, there ARE 2 here. Not to get dark and depressing here, but my In-laws would now win be default.
- I will move to be near my MIL, whether she has retired to Century Village in Florida, decides to live in a nudist colony in Arizona, or goes bat-s**t crazy and moves to Alaska for the fresh sushi. She is so wise and wonderful that I'm sure her choice of habitat will suit me and my husband perfectly!-No, you and your husband are living your own life, any reasonable Mother-In-Law would get that.
- My MIL can so live with me and my husband when she's
- old and can't remember who I am.- Again case to case basis. Me personally I don't know what's going to happen down the road, but at the VERY least, we'd work to make sure she's CLOSE to us so we can be there for her.
And lastly:
Oh, and:
Ok so as a Daughter-in-law HERE is what I would add:
MIL must respect that DIL and her Son are now a family. Th
ere IS room in this family FOR her but she must realize much like when she and her husband started, these two are now a team.
When Children come into play DIL and son will LIKELY turn to her for advice, because look at how awesome her son turned out, BUT at the end of the day the final call falls upon THEM
There should be a MUTUAL respect between BOTH the MIL
and the DIL
MIL should stay out of situations that concern her Son and DIL alone. It's between the two of them, and yes MIL will MORE thank likely side with her son, it's between the two of them , and ONLY them
I think that's it. PS my Mother In-law does all of this...except the kid thing...doesn't really apply though...SO MIL and DIL can live in harmony when following these rules. MIL's remember this is the woman who makes your son happy. DIL remember this is the woman who made your husband AWESOME. When you think about it, you SHOULD be on the same side. ALSO you ARE family now.
As I mentioned, this is dedicated to my Mother-In-Law, who is awesome, and if you disagree...we have to throw down...it's in the contract...
No comments:
Post a Comment