I'm not a Feminist, I'm and Equalist!

So you may or may not have seen my post last week about a healthy relationship. Lets go back a couple decades where the man ruled the roost ok? Remember how women fought for equal rights? I'm TOTALLY for equal rights, I've been called a feminist before. Let me stop you RIGHT there! It would seem these days the stereotypical "feminist" has lost the old vision. Nope it would seem the pendulum has swung the other way. These days WOMEN seem to rule the roost. NO, I'm not a Feminist, I'm and equalist. I would LOVE to tell you that I've always been this way...I haven't. I had one bf, that it was my way or the highway. It was Highway for the record. I was 16 granted, and it would seem that's when this mentality is seen most. Girls think the boys have to do EVERYTHING the girl says. I DID learn from that situation. When I was 17 there was a girl who patted my guy friend on the head and told us all she had him well trained as she leaned back on two legs of her chair....I kicked the chair out from underneath her. He's not a dog. If that was a man doing that to a woman? You think that the girls at that table wouldn't have FLIPPED?! It's cool to be a strong woman, but that's not a strong woman. As a matter of fact that is an insecure woman.

I'm not saying that a woman should do what her man says, and I think I've made it clear I don't think a man should do what his woman says. There should be equal, and do things based on mutual respect. Who wants to be with some one who degrades them like that?

Another thing? EVERY relationship has a more dominating personality. I'll point out in admiration a couple who are DEAR friends of mine. HE is the dominating personality...he's pretty in your face...even more than me. She is more quiet and laid back, but by no means a doormat. They're equals, and treat each other as such. GENERALLY she and I ARE the plan makers, but she says I'll ask him, and if it's the rare occasion I'm planning with him, he does the same. He looks to be the more dominant personality, but there's equality. AND when she does speak up he listens.

Much like my relationship. I'm the more dominant personality (I know it's shocking). Hubs is pretty laid back, and is usually up for anything, but when I make plans with THAT couple, I too say, I'll ask him. I don't think hubs makes plans...it's usually I said for them to talk to you. But we both try and be fair.

There is always a more dominant personality...and there always will be. It's just the respect that is there is what counts.

Like my post last week I'll say, I'm not a trained professional as far as relationships and advice go. This is just MY opinion. Last week it was geared more to what a lady should never settle for, this week, it's more how to be fair in a relationship. Nothing actually brought this on. It really just came to my head and I thought...I'll blog.